


This Always Happens

by rayraycash



Category: One Direction (Band), Radio 1 RPF
Genre: Angst, Comforting, M/M, Sad!Nick, just a lot of angst, no happy ending in sight, one-sided!gryles, one-sided!larry, sad!harry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-10
Updated: 2013-10-10
Packaged: 2017-12-29 00:10:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/998541
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rayraycash/pseuds/rayraycash
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nick Always invites Harry over for drinks, they Always get drunk, and Harry Always calls Louis.</p>
            </blockquote>





	This Always Happens

**Author's Note:**

> I literally just wrote this because I'm just feeling it. It's so unbelievably out of my usual sphere of interest that I'm concerned. I hope this doesn't suck...

“I should call Louis,” Harry slurs out for probably the 50 millionth time that night.

He’s drunk, he’s always like this when he’s drunk and it breaks Nick’s heart every time.

“Harry, don’t call him,” Nick urges, reaching for the popstar’s phone but it’s out of reach. Harry seems to be getting longer the each new visit home.

“But what if he’s sad and he wants to talk to someone,” Harry asks now, looking genuinely terrified that this might be the case, that Louis might be sad somewhere and longing for Harry’s call.

Nick knows better though, and when Harry’s sober, he knows better too.

“It’s 3am Harry, he’s probably asleep.”

The look Harry fixes Nick with can only be described as utter devastation. His face seems to crumple into a mess of snot and tears in only seconds. In the blink of an eye Harry is curled up in Nick’s lap, sobbing and clinging. It’s almost too much for the radio dj, but he’s had a bit of experience in this field. Apparently being friends with Harry Styles also means you’re a counselor.

“He doesn’t love me, does he?” Harry sobs into Nick’s chest.

This always hurt. Nick could feel the physical pain in his chest that he always got when Harry cried like this. Nick isn’t sure where he got his masochistic tendencies, because any normal person would have at least stopped inviting Harry over to his house for drinks. This is what happens every time. They get drunk, and Harry realizes all over again that he and Louis aren’t a thing.

“You’re his best friend, Love,” Nick tries to console the sobbing boy but Harry just snaps his head up, sending a vicious glare.

“That’s not good enough! I love him Nick! I’ve loved him since I was sixteen! I gave him everything! I want him! I need Louis!!!” Harry began screaming that turned back into sobbing that lead to Nick’s heart breaking into even smaller fragments.

Nick can’t remember why he ever thought it would be a good idea to fall in love. It only hurts. Harry is hurting and Nick is hurting because they both want someone who wants someone else. At least Harry is justified though. He and Louis used to be together. They used to go on dates and cuddle and have sexual relations on sleepy Sundays and be in love. Harry was just clinging to the past.

Nick though, Nick just felt like he was being tugged through the rapids, clinging to anything that would let him take a gasp of breath before the raging waters sucked him back in. It hurt. It hurt like nothing else in his life had ever hurt, and it didn’t go away, ever. It didn’t go away when Harry was gone, it didn’t go away when Harry was next to him, it didn’t even go away that one night that Harry had drunkenly snogged him in the back alley they’d found behind a club when Nick had needed a smoke. This suffocating pain was always present and it was scary as Hell.

“Harry, Louis has moved on,” Nick tries to be gentle, he always tries with Harry. But Harry is like fragile glass and even the slightest touch shatters him. 

“I don’t want him to, Grimmy. Why did he do that? Why did he leave me?! I love him! I’ve always loved him! Even when no one else did, I loved him. I just want him… I just want him to love me.” Nick’s heart twisted even more.

Harry sounded pitiful. He was curled up in a ball, sitting in Nick’s lap, desperately gripping Nick’s shirt, crying into it.

Louis was such a fucking twat. How could he sit by and let this happen? How could he ever let someone like Harry go. And especially for that bitch of a girlfriend he’s got now. The thought makes Nick want to spit on Louis’ face.

“You don’t need him Harry. You’re better than that.”

Harry sniffled now, sounding as if he’d gotten most of the sobs out of his system.

“No I’m not. No one wants me. I’m ugly. I’ve got stupid hair and acne and I’m stupid and people only talk to me because I’m famous. He’s the only one that’s ever loved me for me. He’s the only one that’s ever loved just Harry,” Harry confessed now, raising his head to stare at Nick through wet eyelashes.

And the pain just keeps getting worse.

“You are not ugly Harry Styles. You are beautiful. You are the most beautiful man on this planet, do you understand me?”

Harry brought a hand up to wipe snot from his face. Usually Nick would be really disgusted by this, but this is Harry, and Harry breaks literally every precedent that Nick’s ever established.

“Even more beautiful than Nicco?” Harry asks.

Nick internally cringed at the mention of his latest distraction.

“Even more beautiful than Nicco.”

Harry smiled a little at this, but not a real smile. It never reached his eyes and that saddened Nick more than he believed it ever could.

“I’m going to call him,” Harry states now, a little less slur in his voice.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“I can’t just not.”

Harry is giving Nick that look that screams exactly what Nick is feeling. Nick may be a masochist, but Harry takes it to a whole new level. Nick puts himself in heartbreaking situations, Harry just hands his heart over to people he knows will destroy it. The face he’s giving Nick proves that he knows this call won’t end well, but it also says that he’s past the point of no return. It’s like Harry physically has no choice. It’s a feeling Nick knows all too well.

Nick makes no attempt to stop Harry when he presses one on his speed dial and a photo of a smiling Louis Tomlinson appears. Harry brings the phone to his ear and leans his whole body into Nick’s so that Nick can wrap his arms around the boy.

Harry’s phone is turned up so loud that Nick can clearly hear it ring three times before a distinctly female voice answers.

“lo?”

It’s Eleanor. Louis is with Eleanor, and she sounds like she just woke up. Louis is sleeping with Eleanor. Nick thinks he actually hears Harry’s heart snap.

Before Harry can even respond, there’s shuffling on the other end. Louis’ voice, rough with sleep, can be heard in the background followed by more shuffling and finally Louis speaks into the phone.

“Harry.”

It’s a sigh, like the _'this again, really?'_ kind of sigh that Louis has when an interviewer asks him something he’s answered a million times. He probably gets about as much enjoyment out of these calls as Nick does. Louis though, probably isn’t going through as much pain as Nick from these calls.

“Boo Bear,” Harry whispers, traumatized still from Eleanor’s unusual appearance.

“Harry, I’m dating Eleanor. I love her,” Louis speaks softly.

He’s been losing his patience with these calls. It just gets more and more apparent every time.

“Please don’t say that,” Harry whines and curls in a little more, pulling the phone away so it’s harder for Nick to hear.

“I don’t love you Harry. I did once, but I’ve moved on.”

“Louis, no…” Harry whimpered with tears evident in his voice.

“We were kids then. We didn’t know what we wanted.”

“I-”

Before Harry can say anything else though, a whisper of a female voice can be heard on Louis’ end and Louis is ringing off.

“I have to go Harry. Goodnight.”

“I want you…” Harry whispers now as the phone’s screen flashes brightly, signaling the end of the call.

“You’re better than him, Popstar.” Nick tried to soften the blow, it didn’t work though, it never does.

A sob broke from Harry’s chest that was like a tidal wave, hitting his body with violent, convulsing sobs. Nick just held him tight, whispering soft encouragements to his and rubbing his back.

It feels like hours later when Harry has finally worn himself out and fallen to sleep in Nick’s arms. Nick doesn’t stop his consoling though. He continues rubbing Harry’s back and whispering to him and it takes a while for Nick to realize, but somewhere in all the mess that is this awful night, Nick has started crying himself. There are tears still rolling down his cheeks even as he figures it out. 

“What a right mess we’re both in, ‘aye Harold?” Nick asks the sleeping boy in his arms as he stares at a blank television set.

And this night is nothing special, so Nick doesn’t expect an answer, and he doesn’t get one. He never does.


End file.
